Patterns: When Is My Life Going to Change?!


Why do I keep finding the same types of men/women over and over? Why do all my relationships end the same way? Why does my weight or do my cravings always yo-yo?  Why do I keep finding myself in jobs where I don’t feel valued? Sound familiar?

Ever notice how certain patterns seem to recur in life? I’m guessing the particular pattern that is jumping out at you right now is also causing you bit of stress in your life - or else you probably wouldn’t be noticing it.

So why do we get plagued by these patterns in life? Well, it’s life’s way of teaching you that you need to turn your attention towards something. What is this pattern trying to teach you?

If you are continually finding yourself in low-paying, thankless jobs, perhaps you have a deep-seated belief that you aren’t deserving of a high-paying job where people are grateful to have you. In this generation, I think there are many, many people who subconsciously believe they aren’t “good enough” to have the job they want. I often hear things like, “Well, I’m not looking for a job like that because it’s just too competitive.” Dissect that statement for a minute. “Too competitive” What does that tell you? If you are avoiding going after a job you’d love to have because it is too competitive, it means you are avoiding it because you don’t think you are going to be better than the competition. You are letting the numbers frighten you. (I have totally been there!)

This same “not good enough” belief might be carrying over into your relationships too. You feel like you keep running into superficial women or you feel like every guy you meet seems nice at first and then turns into a critical asshole. What’s the deal? Well, perhaps it’s time to uncover the belief that’s hanging out inside of you that is attracting these types of people towards you.

“But I do believe I’m good enough and deserving,” you say, “Where are all the good matches?!” Well, when this time is right, the time is right. Let me explain. Perhaps you feel you need to have a certain number of dollars in your bank account to feel like you are “at a place” where you feel comfortable welcoming a partner into your life. Perhaps you feel that you’ll be ready when you finally have the job you want. Perhaps you feel you’ll finally be ready when you lose 10 pounds. Perhaps you feel you’ll be ready when you’ve traveled the entire world.

If you really sit still and ponder, you will eventually start to realize there are some expectations you have placed on yourself. Because you have placed these on yourself, you are telling the universe you aren’t ready yet and it is responding accordingly. The people you do attract are going to be critical of you because YOU are being critical of you. They will be emotionally unavailable towards you because YOU are being emotionally unavailable towards you.

Patterns happen so we will finally NOTICE them. When we notice them, we can fix them in accordance with what we really want. We can remove the blockage to receiving that. We can fix our thoughts.